(don't let go) just hold me
by alinaandalion
Summary: "Because?" Regina echoes softly, and Emma's eyes are bright bright bright and Regina can't look away even though her chest feels too tight and magic is dancing on her skin.


"_Was that how it happened? You opened your eyes and your whole life changed?"_

_- Beautiful Chaos by Kami Garcia and Margaret Stohl_

"_Things are changing. I cannot say how or what form they shall take eventually, but the change is the thing. It is what makes me feel that all things are possible."_

_- Rebel Angels by Libba Bray_

* * *

Regina leans her head back against the rough stone wall and watches the water dripping down in the corner. _One, two, three, a purple cloud and the world changed again, and then no no no, and emma henry henryandemma, and please no no pleasepleaseplease—_

She's lost count of the days. The cell keeps her trapped, forces her magic to stay put, buzzing right underneath her skin, and she wants to claw it out, scoring ragged nails against her skin until she bleeds_, _but it doesn't help so she sits on her small bed and waits. She waits and counts the drops of water as they hit the ground because this is her new world, this is how it all ends and she is so _tired_.

"Hey."

She doesn't turn her head to acknowledge her visitor, just keeps watching the puddle grow on the ground. "I didn't think you would come down here to see me."

"I was…forbidden, actually, so Henry and I had to come up with a plan to get around the guards."

Regina can't stop herself; she looks at Emma through the cell's bars and smiles, her lips pulling uncomfortably. "Henry is with you? He's safe?"

Emma raises her eyebrows like she doesn't understand the question as she says, "Yeah, the kid's fine. Upset about you being a prisoner, and he is acting like a real little shit about it, driving Mary Margaret and David right up the wall actually, but he's okay."

"And when do you plan to tell him about your parents' plan for me, Miss Swan?" The magic surges a little harder through her veins as she stares at Emma, takes in sad sad eyes and lines around her mouth that weren't there before…before.

Emma flinches then grips the bars, her jaw tight. "You're not dying. I'm getting you out of here."

"Don't waste your time, Miss Swan. They seem quite determined, if our return to this place is any indication."

"It's—it's _Emma_. And I promised. Things are going to be different this time."

Regina laughs and tears spring to her eyes because _nonono_ but this is the way things are, the way they will always be. "How exactly do you plan on getting me out of here, then? Magic is useless against this cell, and the guards are loyal to Snow and David."

"I'll figure something out." Emma clenches the bars until her knuckles turn white and she says, "I'm going to do whatever it takes because this is _wrong_ and Henry isn't going to watch you die. I'm not going to let it happen."

"Just take care of him," Regina whispers, and she is crying now. "Tell him that I love him. More than anything or anyone in this world or the next."

Emma reaches through the cell's bars, her hand held out palm up. "Please. Don't give up."

Shaking her head, Regina turns her back on Emma, watching the water drip dark against the stone.

* * *

"Get up. Regina, _get up_."

Regina groans and glares up at Emma. "What are you doing in here?"

"Breaking you out. I've got the kid and everything." Emma grins and tugs on her arm. "Come on."

"How—what…" and then her arms are full of eleven-year-old boy who smells like hay and woodsmoke, and Regina can barely believe it, she can barely breathe as she pulls him close.

"Mom." Henry grins at her then burrows his head into her neck. "We're here to rescue you."

"Yeah, and we need to get a move on," Emma says, glancing out the cell door. "I don't know how long the guards are going to be passed out."

"Come on, Mom." Henry grabs her hand and leads her out of the cell.

All of the magic that has been humming under her skin for weeks on end suddenly rises, and the torches blaze white-hot before burning to ash. Regina gasps, swaying, trying to rein the magic back in before she does any more damage.

"Regina, did you do that?" Emma's voice is quiet in the darkness, and Regina reaches out for her blindly, sighing with relief when her fingers close around Emma's wrist.

"Yes," Regina snaps as she lets out a heavy breath. "Now, where are we going?"

There's only silence, and Regina almost laughs because _of course_ her son and Emma Swan would break her out of prison with no plan beyond this; and if Snow White and her prince were operating alone, then she would be a lot less concerned about what will happen when they discover she's gone. She can feel the magic building up again, a familiar pounding in the back of her head.

"We have some horses waiting in the stables," Emma offers as she turns her wrist and slips her hand through Regina's.

"It would be faster if you simply had a destination in mind and I can transport us there," Regina says. She digs her nails a little into Emma's palm. "I need to burn off some of this magic."

"How about your old castle?" Henry asks. "I heard Grams talking about it one day. No one will go anywhere near it."

"Kid's right. What do you think, Regina?"

Regina shrugs. "Anywhere will be better than here."

* * *

Regina presses her hands against her stomach, frowning at her reflection in the mirror and gripping the loose fabric in her fists. She rolls her shoulders and tries not to think about her tailored suits and crisp shirts instead of the uncomfortable weight of yards of velvet.

"That dress is kind of…tame. At least, compared to some of the stuff I saw in your closet," Emma says from behind her.

Regina's lips quirk and she runs her fingers through her hair; it's too long. "I'll have to look into changing my old wardrobe. It's a little ostentatious for my taste."

Emma laughs. "You do know you used to wear all of that?"

Shaking her head, Regina flicks her fingers and her hair falls in soft waves around her face, almost past her shoulders. She might cut it later, but she'll keep the length for now. She catches Emma's soft smile in the mirror and turns to look at her.

"How long was I in that cell, Emma?"

"Um, about three and a half weeks." Emma rocks back on her heels and looks down at the floor. "It was kind of freaky, when you just disappeared like that. My parents kept trying to say that you had just left, but I knew better. I'm sorry that I didn't get you out sooner."

"Why didn't you believe them?" Regina asks quietly.

Shrugging, Emma says, "Because I don't trust a lot of things, but the fact that you love Henry more than anything and would never leave him? I'll stake my life on that. I knew you didn't leave him. Because…"

"Because?" Regina echoes softly, and Emma's eyes are bright bright bright and Regina can't look away even though her chest feels too tight and magic is dancing on her skin.

"Because I _know_ you."

Regina breathes out, breathes in, and Emma smiles at her, moves a little closer.

"Hey, Mom, there are people outside!" Henry runs into the room and skids to a stop beside Regina.

"What kind of people, sweetie?" Regina asks, smoothing his hair away from his face.

Henry cocks his head to the side, and Regina's breath catches in her throat, he looks _just like_ Emma. "I don't know. Just people, I guess. I think they want to be let in."

Frowning, Regina crosses the room in long strides, vaguely aware that Emma is trailing behind her. She looks out the window and takes in the small crowd gathering outside the castle gates.

"Who are they?" Emma peers over her shoulder, fingers brushing her waist.

"The people who used to live here." Regina sighs. "It seems word has traveled quickly."

* * *

"Snow and her prince are preparing for war." Kathryn leans back in her chair and glances at Emma. "They've approached me in hopes of an alliance, but given the circumstances—I would prefer to keep my options open."

"Circumstances?" Emma asks.

Regina catches the flash in Kathryn's eyes as she says, "Not everyone is pleased to have been dragged back here."

"Where exactly is your information coming from, Kathryn?" Regina straightens the maps in front of her then reaches under the table and brushes her hand across Emma's bouncing knee.

"From Snow herself." Kathryn's smile is bitter. "She's convinced that you have kidnapped Emma and Henry even though she was the one who locked you up. And she intends to tear this land apart to kill you."

"That's not going to happen," Emma says, and Regina has to look away from Kathryn's piercing gaze.

Regina taps her fingers against the table as she asks, "And how do you propose we stop them, Emma?"

"If I can just _talk_ to them—"

"Your mother thinks Regina has cursed you or something of that nature," Kathryn cuts her off. "No matter what you say, they aren't going to listen. Your parents are gathering an army as we speak, and they _will_ march on the lands that have defected to Regina's rule."

"I've put a protection spell on the borders of my kingdom. That should keep them at bay for a short time." Regina glances back down at the map in front of her. "It won't hold forever, though, so we need to start gathering our own army. Where do you stand on this, Kathryn?"

Kathryn smiles then and says, "I would prefer to avoid war altogether, but it's in the best interests of my kingdom to ensure that this conflict ends quickly. If it does come to war, then you may count me among your allies."

"And if this can all end peacefully and no war happens?" Emma's voice is soft and Regina clenches her fingers into fists to keep from reaching out for her.

"Then the Savior will have performed another miracle," Kathryn replies.

Emma nods her head, and under the table, she wraps her fingers around Regina's fist, holds on tight.

* * *

Sighing, Regina pushes her hair out of her face and looks over at a pacing Emma.

"So this is actually happening?" Emma asks.

"It seems so." Regina turns her attention back to the papers spread on the table. "Unless…"

Emma comes up behind her. "Unless, what?"

"Unless you and Henry go back to your parents, and I can surrender to them." Closing her eyes, Regina breathes, _in out, it won't last forever_.

"No," Emma says, her hand gripping the back of Regina's dress. "No, not that."

"But, if this war happens, Emma, you can't take that back. And I don't know what this will mean for your future." Regina lets out a soft laugh and cranes her neck to see Emma. "I don't want you to give up your family for me."

Reaching up, Emma brushes her fingers against Regina's cheeks and _oh_, and then Emma pulls her close and kisses her. _Oh_. Regina gasps because those are Emma's lips against hers and Emma's hands and fingers and breath, and Regina had thought, hoped but always _surely not_ because this is _Emma_ _emma emma _and yet, and _yet—_

Emma presses a kiss to the corner of her mouth and giggles a little bit when Regina tries to pull her back in. "I've wanted to do that for a long time."

"Then why stop?" Regina murmurs, grasping Emma by the front of her shirt and kissing her again.

She can feel Emma's smile against her mouth, and she moves back until she can lean her weight back on the table, parting her legs so she can pull Emma close close _closer_, rolling her hips up into Emma with a soft whimper and Emma digs her nails into the back of her thighs. Emma presses her nose against Regina's neck and huffs _fuckregina_ as Regina pulls her skirt up and out of the way before sliding her fingers into the waistband of Emma's pants.

"You know, I had thought—" Emma hisses as Regina's hand slides down to cup her. "_Oh, fuck…_that we would do this in, you know, a bed."

Regina just pulls her into another kiss and twitches her fingers, smirking when Emma jerks her hips and groans. She barely even notices the cloud of purple smoke that surrounds them for a few moments and then there are cool sheets against the flushed skin of her legs.

"Will this do, dear?" Regina asks, tilting her head back and letting her lips curve into a slow smile.

Emma watches her with wide, bright bright eyes, and Regina edges back onto the bed, her fingers fumbling with the fastenings of her dress. Emma doesn't follow, too busy stripping out of her pants; Regina bites back an amused grin and finally settles for waving her hand, banishing their clothes to a small pile beside the bed.

"Wow," Emma breathes as she shuffles forward on her knees, reaching out and trailing a hesitant hand across Regina's hip. "Wow, you're beautiful."

Regina takes Emma's hand and twines their fingers together. "Come here. Come here."

* * *

Emma shifts beside her, presses a kiss to her shoulder. "Hey."

"Hey," Regina whispers, smiling as Emma nuzzles at her neck.

It's so soft that Regina almost doesn't hear it, wonders if maybe she imagines it. "Love you."

Regina brushes a kiss against Emma's cheek and asks though her heart is rabbiting in her chest, asks though she wants to just close her eyes and bask in this for as long as she can, "Are you sure about this?"

"Yeah." Emma pushes herself up onto her elbow and presses her hand against Regina's chest, right over her heart. "I am."

Regina smiles. "Okay." And she takes Emma's hand, kisses the tip of each finger, and Emma laughs and it's beautiful and it's real and it's hers.


End file.
